My tendency to become overly invested…

in television shows has become a problem. I mean, not really – it’s a beautiful thing – but it drives me mad. Last week, Criminal Minds almost gave me a heart attack, and I was soaked in my own tears by the end of the episode. That’s not uncommon for me when it comes to that show, but this week was especially hard. I was actually really sad for the rest of the night, like something bad had actually happened. It was weird. In a few days Monk will end, for good. I have had to wipe my eyes …

Fat Acceptance.

Although I have not and will never do the same, I don’t have a problem with people who have accepted their larger shapes and have decided not to beat themselves up over it. More power to you, but I don’t believe in the Fat Acceptance movement. I don’t believe that we should let our children believe that it’s fine to be overweight or obese. The obesity rate in children here in the states is ridiculously high. They learn that at home. It’s not okay – we are jeopardizing the lives of those we swear to love the most with …

Eating my thoughts.

A few weeks ago at the park, the girls were playing on their favorite jungle gym when a host of other little children arrived and started to play too. Ari had been going down the slide, over and over, taking her time and enjoying herself immensely. As she made to sit down and position herself to go down the slide again, one of the new little children, a little girl around 4 or 5 ran up, leaned down and put on the ugliest face she could to intimidate Ari. “Get out of the way.” she sneered. Ari looked at …

The Shocker. Yes, *that* Shocker.

Men are interesting creatures. Most of them that I have met are especially intrigued by anal play, but never seem to want to admit it. It starts off as a joke, or as a ‘oh i dunno’ type of conversation while you’re discussing sexual fantasies/experiences/preferences, but rarely do they just come right out and say ‘I’d like to stick my whatever in your ass, if you’ll let me.’ I don’t get it. It’s like they really believe that girls don’t poop, and thus, we don’t have assholes, and thus, we don’t do anal or it’s like a really taboo …

Not everyone will like you.

It started with the Yo Gabba Gabba! song “Be Nice to Everyone“. “Is that true, mommy?” asked The Bella, “If you’re nice to everyone, they’ll be nice to you too?” “No.” I answered succinctly. “So they’re telling a story?” “Not really, I mean you should always be nice to people but just because you are doesn’t mean some people won’t be assholes anyway.” “Well, I will be nice.” “Good. And those that aren’t nice back, fuck ‘em, it’s their problem.” “Ok!” *** The Bella starts Kindergarten in 3 weeks (OHMYGOD!) and for the first time really, she’ll come face …

Meh is the new FAIL.

Hello, how are you? Me? I’m fabulous. Lately, I say that anytime someone asks me, and every day it’s a little more true. I am fabulous. Life is great. My kids are great. I don’t have any dire concerns right now and I’m happy. I totally mean it. Wow. I mean it. I’m fucking awesome. I need to work better at being an adult. It’s almost impossible for me to multitask. I get all wrapped up in the next big thing in my life, and devote the majority of my time to it and everything else falls by the …

Stream of Consciousness: Daughters

We went outside today. It hadn’t been so beautiful in so long. With messy ponytails and pajama pants, we traipsed around the acres I myself grew up exploring. Well, they traipsed. I sat and watched. I look at them, these beautiful things, so solid in our universe, and the days before their existence is blurry. They step on bugs and pluck dandelions from the dry grass, so confident that they belong just where they are, not yet troubled by anything of consequence… completely unmarred by life. As the sun shines down on them, their bodies cast elongated shadows on …

“She’d be DECIMATED.”

I appreciate it when people don’t sugarcoat parenting, or act like children are the holy grail and people aren’t allowed to call them on their bullshit. Sometimes, they are little fucking assholes and you want to kick them out of windows. It’s just the truth. I love my daughters, but sometimes I really do not like them. At all. And if you’re a parent and honest with yourself, I think it’s probably the same for you. I’ve yet to meet anyone that wasn’t delusional that didn’t nod yes to that statement. I like this guy. I’m going to see …

If opposites attract, I must be the absolute nicest person on the planet.

What the hell?! The other night, Joey and I went to see Modest Mouse. Show started at 9pm, we got there pretty early, and got a good spot, behind the railing that separated the floor from the people down there in the little…pit? I dunno. There were a couple of girls in front of us, and we weren’t all shoved up on them because I believe in respecting personal space. And it was hot enough. Shit. Anyway, as the show went on, things got more crowded, but it was fine. Once, two girls moved in front of us and …

Movie review: Closure

Every once in a while, someone touches your life in a an unexpected and deeply meaningful way. Such is the case when I had the good fortune to meet Angela Tucker. Angela Tucker and me. All because: Once upon a time, I saw a trailer, cried an ugly sniveling cry, and promptly emailed the producer to say ILOVEYOUALLHOWCANISEEYOURFILM? It’s true. I did that waaaay back in the spring, was allowed to see an advanced copy, promised a review, and then I got to hug Angela at Pact Camp because she and her husband brought their film to Pact Camp! …