I have lead a sheltered life.

Last night I was edu-ma-cated. In the horror that is the douche bag. Was minding my own business, having a little break from the monotony that is the life of a mother of 3 lazy fucking bloodsuckers children and wandered over to Boobs, Injuries and Dr Pepper. And was shocked and horrified and laughed so much I peed a little. Probably requiring the services of said douche bag. I am not totally sheltered. I have heard of douches. Just didn’t realise that they came in the handy bag version. That apparently mothers hung from their showers. And small children …

Happy Valentines Day <3

Or not. Meh. I am usually so meh about this ‘holiday’. MPS, not known for his romantic skillz, usually forgets. Even when he was reading the freaking ads and doing outside broadcasts at flower shops. ‘Sorry honey, I forgot’ Yeah, whatever. So this morning I needed heart massage was pleasantly surprised when MPS presented me with a latte in bed. Complete with heart design. Good thing I was in bed. Cause the fall would have hurt. Then as he was walking out the door he called out: ‘I bought you a gift! It is on the kitchen bench. I …